Blueish Chapter 3

I saw the changes in others, most of them became successful.. I stop and faced the mirror, I'm the same old me with no progress except some traces of winkles.. Time passes quickly, and i have no idea where did I spend my time on. Definitely not quality time spent..

I have wanted someone to be nice to me.. I found the one, but strangely, although I appreciate what has been done for me. Deep in my heart, I kept telling myself it wasn't meant to be and I wan out.. Did I take things for granted? It that another heart I'm going to break? I really don't understand myself. All the things I've done, seems like I'm just obtaining happiness for my own self.. there isn't really much time to think of others.. I need someone to rely on..

I'm confused about my life, I think i need more rest.. but time is passing real fast and I'm spending time typing these stuff.. Just noticed I have a lot of 'I's in my blog.. *Self-centred person*

till next time..

Blueish Chapter 2

hur hur, the time lapse from the 1st entry the the 2nd entry is....

anyway, I've learnt that you can't blame people for changing, You blame yourself for not being able to accept the changes on other.

things normally happened with a cause, and builds up with time. I still believed that people dun change overnight, if they do, something really big must had happened and we are just kept in the dark.

Often, we feel that certain things we should just keep it to ourself.. and it's these things that you did not tell other makes a different.. they do not know your reason and the rational behind.. it seems like after, you need to have someone whom you can share your problems with... Girlfriend/boyfriend ?

Human are anti-loneliness creature, we need to find someone to rely or depend on, at any point of time be it a stranger..

Imagine you went for an outing, with lots of strangers.. you sit there alone, but your mind's focusing and targeting one if not more people who 'out-shine' others for u to start relying on.
same things applied on a job interview, talking to another interviewee to de-stress.

It had been quite long since my last soul mate, I have been quite busy and lazy.. haven been doing much interactive or widen my social circle. It just makes my choice limited. Perhaps, if there's one that is meant to be. It would had already been.. it shouldn't take so long.. heh..

I don't seems to have to many problem when I was a kid.. now responsibility and stress took me down. But i can't look back, the past may be great.. but life goes on and looking back does not means living back.. I can't reverse, stop or re-live what's past and gone.

I am learning to take new steps everyday.. slowly, I'm taking my own sweet time.. time passes too quickly, whether or not I work.

Sometimes, I wish I was someone else, but decision is not up to individuals.. no matter how much pain, hurt, stress or angry.. it's part and parcel of life... things dun happened the way I want them to be..

The things we need are always around us, but time and time again we fail to notice.. not because we don't want to.. I would guess the time is not right.

Time to take a rest.. continue in next chapter... no guarantee... I just hope that life gets better.. There is really nothing much to ask for, or the least to ask for.

to be continue...